A Legacy of Love and Laughter

My mother-in-law, Hazel, passed away Jan. 28th, 2011. She had Alzheimer's. That's a blog in itself and I don't want to "go there" with this post, I want to talk about Hazel, the mom. I usually refer to Hazel as JC's little mama. I don't why I call her that, it just seems to fit. Hazel was anything but little and fragile. She had a strong body and a strong will. Floyd and Hazel were married in 1947 and raised 8 kids on a farm in rural Howell County Missouri. They had moved around a little bit early on because JC was born in Wichita, Kansas. Later, they returned to Floyd's family's farm and there they settled to raise their kids.

The first time I met Hazel, she hugged me. I was a bit surprised because I'm not from a family of "huggers." I thought maybe she knew that "I was the one" for JC. I realized later that Hazel just hugged everybody. Even if you didn't want a hug, you got one anyway. If you tried to get away she would still give you a sideways hug. That was Hazel's way.

It was hard raising 8 kids. Hazel couldn't give the kids a lot of material things but she gave the kids something far greater; she gave them all the love that she had. The Ledbetter kids know without a doubt that their mother loved them. She never criticized, never offered unsolicited advice and never judged. She let the kids stumble and make mistakes so they would learn from those mistakes. Then she waited with open arms when they needed her to comfort them.

Hazel loved to laugh. She was always smiling and laughing. I can't remember ever a time until she got so sick that she wasn't smiling and laughing. She would cut up with the kids, grandkids and great-grandkids. It made her happy to make others happy.

I've often thought about how hard her life must have been. Just cooking meals for a family of 10 was a big chore. JC told me that she would line them all up for hand-washing and tooth-brushing. He said that it was like a little assembly line, everybody getting a squirt of toothpaste. She insisted on clean hands - you couldn't come to the table without first "washing up." She told me once that you couldn't afford for germs to spread through 8 kids! Hazel cooked, cleaned, did the laundry for 10 and on top of that she raised a garden, took care of her chickens and helped Floyd with the farm. She never complained, always smiling and laughing, always hugging.

At her service, the pastor, a long time family friend and husband of Hazel's niece, said that Hazel left a legacy of love and laughter. I like that. What a great legacy to leave for your family. Hazel's grand-daughter, Robyn, spoke of her love and respect for her granny. She talked of the love shared by all of Hazel and Floyd's descendents. She reminded us how lucky they are to have a family that cares so much for each other. Robyn said that each time that we see a chicken in a pen or a weed that needs pulled in the garden, we will be reminded of Hazel.

I hope that the Ledbetter kids, grandkids, and great-grandkids will carry on this legacy of love and laughter. It's worth more than anything that money could ever buy.